In April and May of this year,I went to a training in a technique called “ReCreation of the Self” (RcS), which is based out of Hakomi Therapy. One of the big tenants of this system is that we have the choice to move ourselves into an expanded state, or to move into, or stay in, a more contracted one. A trained RcS practitioner can show you how to access more expansive states and then give you the tools to get there yourself.

Various people have talked about our ability to do this in different ways over the years: “choose only love”, “love is letting go of fear”, or “you create your own reality” which is a more all-encompassing view of the process. Now, contributions from neuroscience are coming into the conversation and the understandings about how our experiences and behavior patterns are built in the brain, has made it possible to approach this perspective from a more materialistic or scientifically based direction./ Read the rest of this entry »

You may be dealing with confusion around many things as basic as who you are, what you’re doing or why you’re doing it. The first thing to do to approach this situation is to get in touch with the fact that you’re confused. Just say it. “I’m confused.” If you can do that, then it can all end right there. Rather than spend weeks or months spinning around trying to figure something out or act like you know what you’re doing, just throw down the anchor and let her rip: “I’m confused.”

That should be really obvious, right? But it’s not, is it? Because no one wants to admit that they’re confused (or they made a mistake). So, in order to do this very simple, human thing, you might need some support. Tom Fuller, or some other therapist might need to be there and say, “Hey Joe, you seem confused. Can you feel that? Can you be with that for a minute?”
Since Tom or whomever, is saying this, and you trust him and you know he’s not trying to disrespect you, you stop and take a breath,and feel it: “Oh wow, man, yeah, I’m really confused!” (what a relief that is!) Read the rest of this entry »

The Buddha provided many ethical guidelines in his teachings about how to navigate this realm; how to conduct ourselves in such a way that we move in the direction of awakening and alignment with the natural way of things.

One way to view this is that we are on a quest of sorts, to develop ourselves spiritually and to wake up from the illusion of a separate self. We’ve done our rebellion and we’ve come back towards a spiritual tradition and are willing to look for guidance from someone who’s gone before. The Buddha went this way before, and left a map for others to follow. The Buddha and many, many, others who came after him woke up. They saw through the ego and became enlightened. We need to check for ourselves, but if we choose to follow this path, we need to develop confidence in these practices and engage in the work of transforming our lives. We do that by taking the first step, or, whatever for us is the next step. As we do that, as we practice consistently, our lives begin to give us more positive feedback. We see that this way makes sense, these practices work, and then we can commit ourselves to it more whole-heartedly.

One of the first teachers that I did in-depth Buddhist study with was Fried Smith. He worked out of his home, with kids running around and doing what families do. He had Multiple Sclerosis and had enough wisdom to keep me coming back almost weekly for five years. Fred had certain phrases like “find out that work works”, “negotiate it (your personal material) to voidness” and “it’s important to develop confidence in the teachings”. These sayings all grew on me over time, but the last one took the longest to sink in. Read the rest of this entry »

Many people have a hard time with the dark time of the year. There’s so much less energy around to carry on our affairs, or to keep us afloat emotionally. What the dark does provide, however, is an opportunity for deep transformation.
If we know how to go into it, if we know how to work with it, if we know how to let it work on us.

In the winter, because of the lack of light and warmth, there is a general hibernation that wants to go on. Like plants, our energy is in the roots and there’s little going on in the leaves, flowers and shoots. This really is a returning to the dark underground. This is hard for the ego but good for the soul, because just like a good long sleep, deep replenishing is going on during this time.

If you can go with this process and not fight it with constant attempts to “stay up”, then there will be a natural emerging that occurs in the Spring when the light and energy of the sun return. Then, just like the trees that start budding, and the flowers that start sending up their first color, you will bloom as a new being. Literally new! Read the rest of this entry »

With everyone being so busy these days, it’s easy to give in to a sense of pressure, stress and not having enough time to do what needs to be done. The internet brings so much more speed and complexity to our lives, jobs are increasingly fluid and changeable, relationships have their challenges and it’s very hard to have a place to rest anymore. The traditions that we relied on and carried us for centuries all seem to be disappearing.

A big part of what the awakened life is about is acknowledging the stretch and the struggle of these periods, and staying awake and breathing through them. By that I mean not letting yourself get caught up in just the doing-”checking one more thing off your list”, but in staying present for each of these activities. Read the rest of this entry »

It’s important to remember that the reason we’re transforming conditioning is so that we can live more and more out of our hearts.

What do I mean by conditioning?
It’s the process of first others and then ourselves, telling us who we are and how or what we should be. It starts with parents then teachers, peers, the media and even gurus. It’s the way we get trained into being good boys and girls and it’s the training we get when we rebel against that. Conditioning is protection laid over the heart so that we can survive in an unsafe environment. It’s the program that gets set up for us to become a better and better person.

The work that I’m talking about is about coming back to ourselves so that we can live out of the core of our being, rather than out of our conditioning. Read the rest of this entry »

The Awareness, the Presence, that I discuss in my blogs and Dharma Talks is not in the realm of concept or thought. It’s below the realm of thought.

For most people, coming to the place of dropping below the realm of thought is a big step. Our tendency to “try to improve our situation” is so hardwired into us that to suggest anything else seems like pure heresy. This whole self-improvement project takes place in the realm of thought and, unless it’s done consciously, it can be a great distraction to the process of opening spiritually. It can actually make it impossible, because true opening has a certain degree of surrender in it. All our efforts at self-improvement are going to keep us in our heads and keep us from opening to the moment.

I’m not asking people to give up trying to improve their situation. I’m suggesting they give up their identification with this process. Read the rest of this entry »

“Take the risk of being present – dive into the abyss.”

That’s how I was going to start my last Dharma talk, but it morphed into “Relax into this present moment”.

I recognized that the latter was more of an invitation and less likely to be coopted by ego – as something else for my “spiritual pusher” to do. It was actually an echo of a sentiment I’d heard in a talk by Tai Situ (The regent for the Karmapa) about 15 years ago in Ukiah, California. The message I took away from that talk was “take a couple of years to cool yourself out as a good way to embark on spiritual practice.”

15 years later, this message keeps surfacing from different sources: “Relax into the present. Rest in Awareness. Be Here Now”

What I’ve come to see in that 15 years is that what keeps us from really being in the present and resting in awareness is our addiction to the thinking mind. We have a tendency to be involved with the story about reality rather than reality itself. Read the rest of this entry »

View videos of my recent appearance on The Doctor’s Corner.

While we’re contemplating the fact of our inevitable demise, It’s also important to consider that who dies may not be What we really are! 

What do I mean by that.?
What dies is our Story, which is perpetuated by thought. The story of “will I get what I don’t want, will I not get what I want?” Over and over again. This is the tyranny of the “me” , the little ego, demanding it’s way.
When this dies, What lives on is the Presence, the Spirit, the Actuality of what we are. Read the rest of this entry »